Last night a hurricane blew through New England. Even though the center of the storm was far off at sea, we had high winds and heavy rain. I went up to bed early but decided to check out Grindr and Scruff to see who was online.

I chatted with a really handsome young gay guy from NYC, who works as a publicist, and was visiting New England with a female friend. They were staying in a boarding house two blocks away. He described himself as an ‘easygoing funny preppy passive bottom’. And I thought to myself, what is a passive bottom? Does he just lay there while some guy has his way with him? I continue to find the labels gay men put on themselves quite funny and sadly limiting.

I think of myself as a gay man. I’m not ready to add a bunch of more labels at this point and rather, look to discover who I am as a gay man. So possibly as I learn more about myself as an out gay man I’ll add more labels to my profile, but for the moment I’ll just stick with just the gay label for starters.