My boyfriend, as we hiked in a local park this morning, told me to ‘get over it’, that I was in the ‘hot dad zone’, and would be for years to come. This was after he noted the grey hair that was coming in, making my temples salt and pepper.
I hardly think of myself as the daddy type but have to remind myself when I see a hot younger man that I am not a kid anymore, and that I am probably old enough to be the hot young guy’s father.
In my apartment building there a number of really hot looking younger guys. They are ‘eye candy’, and I suspect, would not be interested in me. But then…as a hot dad, maybe they would.
Yesterday in the elevator of my building was a youngish guy with his daughter, who was about eight. He was so sexy with salt and pepper hair and beard and a beautiful face and trim body. I wanted to look at him desperately and at the same time was trying not to stare. While I did not know if he was gay or straight, I wondered if he would find me attractive, or too old for him. I am not sure I will ever know, but it was nice just to look.
My experience with younger guys is that they are more interested in the destination than the journey. By destination, I mean that their goal is to reach orgasm as quickly as possible. As an older hot dad, I am more interested in the journey, building intimacy and a relationship, and do not really care if I ever get to the destination.
I could play for hours sexually, with lots of touching, kissing, cuddling, and often do not worry if I ever reach orgasm. One of the lovely things about being with my partner is to lie in bed, with his back to my chest, with my arms wrapped around him. I could lie like that for hours, and I feel so at one with the world in those moments.
With a sexy guy closer to my age, like my boyfriend, I love how we can explore each other’s bodies, for what seems like forever. The journey becomes the destination. Too many guys, so busy to reach an orgasm, miss the deep pleasure of the journey to get there.
When I have played sexually with younger men I have been struck by how quick the experience can be and how joyless. That is not to say that younger men are not exciting. They are very exciting to be with, but the excitement so quickly gets to an urgency to reach orgasm, that they miss the pleasure of just exploring another man’s body.
So maybe I am in the hot dad zone, but that does not mean I want to be a daddy to some young guy. I like my men closer to my own age and more ready for a slow, pleasurable, deeply intimate journey.