The Camera

I have a vivid memory of a birthday when I was around eight years old. I had gotten a brownie camera that morning, a birthday gift from my parents. I was excitedly running around the house taking pictures. Suddenly dad was angry at me. I had done something wrong in the eyes of my father. I was never exactly sure what I had done. He got angry at me, threatening some kind of punishment. I remember being very hurt that my father was yelling at me on my special day. There was something about me that could bring out my fathers anger, even thought I knew he loved me.

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Day 73

Day 73 at home. This is our new normal. There are things I like about home confinement and there are things I do not. I like sleeping late once in a while and staying up late binging on new steaming shows. I also like the quiet to write this blog and to work on the beginnings of a memoir. My husband and I are wonderful partners to each other in this difficult time. While I miss the occasional dinner out or dinner parties at home or running errands to different stores, I am happy to forgo that to be safe.

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My Life: Vignettes Over Time – Part IV

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When I look back at my journals from 2012 when I first began to come out, what I wrote extensively about was finding love. I wrote in one journal entry, “I want true love. I want to find that one guy who I can be a soul mate with, that I can be honest and real with and have a deep connection with. Is it possible? I really don’t know. I feel that so many of us are so damaged by this age, that I’m not sure what I want is real or attainable.” Continue reading