Base Desires

When a famous person or politician, usually a man, gets caught having inappropriate sex, there is often a nashing of teeth about how he could have “thrown it all away” for sex. Well, I think I know the answer to that question.

Continue reading

No Longer Myself

What alters our sense of self?  How do major life events make us feel less ourselves, and at times, have us lose sight of who we are? Continue reading

No Longer Home

Since before my wife’s death this past April, I began to live in the house that I had moved out of four years earlier when I began my life as an out gay man. I had never planned to live in our house again. But that all changed as my wife’s health declined from terminal cancer.  Continue reading

The Great Trump Wars

soldier_America_Flag_AP_img

I am not a Muslim nor was I born in one of the seven countries Donald Trump has chosen to block entry into the United States from. I am a white man of privilege, born in the United States. I am also an out gay man.  Continue reading

Act III

At 59 years old I am faced with an interesting set of choices. After working in the corporate world with a focus on information systems for the past 32 years in primarily profit-driven companies, I have the opportunity to take a leadership role in a highly mission-driven organization that provides consulting, services, and programs around the world.  Continue reading

The Little Death

Litany Against Fear from the book Dune, by Frank Herbert

There is real death, and then there is what I think of as, the little death. When I use this term I do not mean what people describe as, la petite more, a term that is tied to the feelings at the point of orgasm. I always think of, the little death, as it was described in the book Dune, by Frank Herbert. He writes in the Litany Against Fear: “I have no fear, for fear is the little death that kills me over and over. Without fear, I die but once.”  Continue reading

The Counterpoint

In my prior post, I described some of my thoughts and feelings as I approached beginning divorce mediation with my wife. Before finalizing and posting my last blog post, I made sure that I had a conversation with my partner to share with him what I was feeling and thinking. I did not want him to read intimate thoughts and feelings that touched our relationship for the first time online.  Continue reading

An Out, Drunken, Bonding Weekend

IMG_3258

This weekend I visited my son at college for his fraternity’s father’s weekend. As a gay man, I was not quite sure what to expect. Before coming I asked my son, jokingly, was I going to have to play football? A sport which I know very little about. He assured me, no football. Continue reading

A Small Act of Courage

Photo 20160308212353089

A quote that I love and keep on a piece of paper on my desk at work, from a Washington Post article a few years ago, is this:

“Life seems to be a continual act of coming out, isn’t it? The boundaries we think are uncrossable, the unnamable corners of our soul that we live in fear of bringing to light . . . are the very regions that allow us to feel complete if we dare to explore them. So thank you for crossing borders, shining a light into those corners — they only make you more lovable, more admirable.”

Continue reading