Becoming One

Coming Out At Work

Today I am an out and proud gay man. I am out in every facet of my life. But this has not always been the case. I began dating a woman in 1990, who I fell in love with, and we married two years later. We have a 19 year old son together. While I had know about my attraction to men since I was fourteen, and told my wife when we first started dating, I only began to come out fully about five years ago, and subsequently moved out of my marriage almost three years ago.

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Getting My Gay Together and Taking it On the Road

We recently launched an LGBT Resource Group at my company and I am acting as the executive sponsor.  As part of launching this group we are holding Lunch & Learn meeting around the company at different company locations.  The attendance has been generally small but the discussion lively.

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The Fear Door

As I’ve moved through the journey of coming out these past years, every time that I’ve taken a step forward, in spite of my fear, it has ultimately been positive.  The fear door, once stepped through, has unknowns on the other side.  For me, the wonder of what is on the other side of the fear door is part of the excitement. Continue reading

Coming Out to the Division Leadership

Today I stood in front of about 175 people in a leadership meeting for the division I lead at my company and came out. While I didn’t read from the document below, I did write down what I wanted to say in advance and used it to think through my message. I wanted to be clear and strong in what I said. Continue reading

Fighting the Whittling Away of Desire

As a teenager, when I thought about my life to come, I thought about how I would make my mark on the world. I would ask myself what I could be or do in the world where I could leave a mark? Would I be famous? I would imagine all sorts of possibilities. But it was more than famous, it was doing something great in the world that people would respect and know me for. I think these are the questions most teenagers ask themselves. Continue reading

Fear, Joy and Fellow LGBT Travelers

There’s a woman who worked in my organization at my last job, that I recruited to the company I joined three years ago. I’ll call her Jane. We’ve known each other for the past five years. Jane never worked directly for me, but always worked for someone who reported to me. Yesterday we came out to each other. Since this is work, we didn’t come out to each other directly, but another woman at the company emailed me that Jane, and two other people, a man and another woman, were interested in getting involved with the new LGBT resource group, of which I’m the executive sponsor. I was very excited to see Jane’s name in the email along with the other two employees. Jane is someone who is a strong leader and I was hoping to find a way to get her involved in the LGBT resource group. But because we weren’t out to each other, there was no way for us to have a conversation on the topic. Continue reading

Putting The Life Back Into My Life

Between the launch of my companies LGBT resource group, where I will be the executive sponsor, and interviewing to join the Board of Directors of a nonprofit LGBT health organization, my life is about to launch into the next phase of this amazing journey. Continue reading